


Crushed By Last Call

by jethisis



Category: Disenchantment (Cartoon 2018)
Genre: 5 years before canon, Bean being a drunk, Budding Love, F/M, First Kiss, One Shot, Pendergast Pre Knighthood, Pre-Canon, Underage Drinking, [before season 3], teenage angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-25
Updated: 2020-10-25
Packaged: 2021-03-09 04:01:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,112
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27187657
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jethisis/pseuds/jethisis
Summary: With a giant promotion staring him in the face, Pendergast is set with the impossible task of getting the Princess Tiabeanie home before Last Call.
Relationships: Bean | Tiabeanie/Pendergast (Disenchantment)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 30





	Crushed By Last Call

Before becoming Head of this Zøg Knights, Pendergast was once a squire, who dreamed of being a knight.

The large, lazy king of dreamland sat at in the front of the room, septer in hand and a grim, fatigued look on his face. "Squire Pendergast, I'm glad you came. I ain't normally one for asking the new recruits for this kinda difficult favour, but I see something inside you. Something good, something strong." The king murmered, nodding in agreement with himself, while his queen sat boredly beside him. "This may be one of the most difficult tasks to ask you, but I'm sure... I dunno, you'll probably succeed."

Perdergast was only fifteen at the time when he first enrolled to join King Zøg's army, before he lost his eye and had thought there was a world worth changing and making better. "King Zøg," The squire said with an air of regality. "Any task you give me, I swear, I will give it my all."

Zøg cocked a brow, scratching his meating hand against his scalp. "Uh, yeah, sure." He said in an unsure manner, glimpsing towards Oona; her narrow, amphibious gaze focused on him, insisting he continue with a sharp nod. The King grumbled in dismay. "Look. I need you to go out and bring my little girl home."

Pendergast's brow rose with surprise, the task seeming too much for a new recruit. "Princess Tiabeanie is missing?"

"Well, I wouldn't exactly say 'missing'," He chuckled awkwardly before his voice fell into a defeated groan, Oona's exhausted eyes fixated on her loaf of a husband, while Zøg held his head in his hands, holding back his frustration. "Look, she's down at the Flying Septor, and I don't want her missing her birthday tomorrow, if you can get her outta there before last call, I'll even put you at the head of the Zøg table."

Pendergasts' eyes widened with excitement; the head of the table was also the head of all the guards, and for a swift escort home, it seemed like quite the deal. Pendergast stood up straight. "I'll have her home in no time, King Zøg." He insisted, before turning to leave the throne room.

Zøg chuckled nervously. "Well, you say that..."

The knight began to make his way out of the castle, but strolled the grand hall for a good look at the princess's portrait to determine his target. Despite the frown and crossed arms, her portrait was regal, long white hair that shimmered like ice on snow, twisted up into a fashionable style. Blue eyes that could counter the ocean in their deepness. Pink wasn't for her complexion, but the portrait donned her in the colour of cherry blossoms, her frock covered in frills. Pendergast couldn't help but smile at the portrait, the princess appearing fetching, and he was nervous to meet her eye for the very first time.

It was a short walk down the hill towards the pub, the steeping angle encouraging his pace, and Pendergast whistled the entire way there, already anticipating his easy promotion. _This'll be a piece of cake if all I have to do is escort a princess home_. The pubs sign swung in the gentle breeze, crude writing hung above a window, it's glass shattered. The walls were near tumbling, made of cheap particle stone, and from the inside of the building, the squire could hear boisterous cheers and laughter. When Pendergast peaked through the door of the pub, he expected the princess's regal presence to be obvious, finery, silk clothing, people looking in awe at the Princess amongst the commoners, but that wasn't the case. Common clothes and dirty peasants filled the room, the stench of smoke and ale filling his nose, and two men began to shove one another in the far corner of the room.

The only thing that seemed obscure was a tiara atop someone's head.

Pendergast weaved through the tables with intrigue; the woman with the crown wore a common blue tunic that did nothing for her boxy figure, with dirty trousers and muddied boots. Her long, white hair fell in tangles down her back, and the sound of cheerful hiccups came from the table, though her company was dimming out one by one. The woman was rather familiar, he'd seen her at least a thousand times, drunk in the streets or causing havoc on her own through the town, though Pendergast always wondered how the young drunkard never ended up in the cells beneath Dreamland.

With an air of importance, Pendergast straightened his posture, squaring his shoulders back and forcing a lower, more manly tone as he spoke down to the woman. "I'm sorry miss, but I'll have to ask you to return that tiara to the Princess Tiabeanie, in the name of King Zøg."

When the young woman turned over, his eyes carefully scowered her face for details, any information of the sudden culprit, realizing she couldn't have been more than fourteen. Deep blue, challenging eyes were tinted red from the grog, buck teeth spread into a shifty smile and a freckles splotched over her cheeks. The woman snorted at Pendergast's words. "Nobody, _ever_ , calls me _Tiabeanie_."

Pendergast could hardly believe his eyes, almost tempted to rub them in confusion. Her mother was rumored to be a sight to behold, and after laying eyes on the princess's portrait, the man only assumed the daughter would somewhat match. "You're Princess Tiabeanie?" He said in bafflement, his jaw nearly dropping.

"That's 'Bean' to you, guy." She insisted, rising to her feet but stumbling in the process; she was nearly a foot shorter, but glared at the man as though she were ten feet tall. Suddenly, her disgruntled face spread into a mischevious grin. "Wait, you're the squire guy, Pencil Goose-"

"Knight Pendergast." He insisted, already expecting his promotion, however the Princess continued to speak.

"Let me guess," Her eyes lowered down the man's feet than back to his eyes, focusing hard on his pupils, but staggering as she spoke. "My dad sent you to bring me home so I won't miss that stupid party tomorrow.'

His brows furrowed beneath his brown hair. "That-uh- That's correct-"

"And-" she continued, cutting him off. "I bet he promised you a spot at the 'Zøg Table' you if you get me home before last call."

Pendergast gave the princess a timid, skeptical look, wondering how many knights were asked to bring Tiabeanie home, how many had failed. "He... did."

The bar bellowed out into a sudden boisterous laughter, several men scoffing at the idea of Bean returning before last call. The Princess scowled, nearly flinging herself back down onto her chair and crossing one leg over the other. "Well, I'm not going, so you can kiss that _knight-hood_ goodbye."

Pendergast tried to keep his important air, lifting his head and staring the Princess down. "Your father said-"

The Princess lifted her hands, pointing towards her Tiara. "You see this crown? Tiara?... Whatever...Goose Guy? I'm the princess, I don't take orders from... Random... Squire... Guys, and I _especially_ don't take orders from my dad." Her arms crossed over her chest, as though she had won the argument.

Pendergast felt as though he were stuck between a rock and a hard place. The King had a temper and was known for throwing 'disposables' from the castle, and the Princess seemed to be his equal match. Her blue eyes dared him to make a move, and he, in turn, wasn't sure what to do, how to handle a snotty princess with a temper. He straightened his posture and met Bean's intoxicated glare with his own. "Fine." He scowled as he stepped to her side, and dumped a sleeping drunk man off a chair. He pulled it closer to bean, taking a seat to her left a to wait. "You wanna hang out here? That's fine. But after, I'm bringing back to the castle."

Bean frowned at him, and though the bar grew disinterested in their bickering. A silent three minutes passed without as much as a twitch of a muscle. "You're serious..." She said with bafflement. Pendergast would only lift his head, staring her down with a look of determination, meeting her challenge. She scowled, an annoyed scoff passing by her lips. "Fine, do whatever you want." She said angrily, taking her large pint and chugging it back like a practiced drunk. The princess wiped her mouth with the back of her dirty hand, and raised her empty cup. "Barkeep! Another round for me and my friends."

The bartender scoffed from the counter., wiping a mug clean. "You ain't got friends Princess. You want me to just throw a round through the bar?"

The comment seemed to strike a nerve with the Princess, though the crowd laughed and happily took their free drink. "Yeah, sure, whatever." She grumbled, leaning on her elbow. Pendergast watched with bafflement, never truly meeting a princess, but having an idea of what she _should_ have been in his head. Suddenly, her eyes shifted over to him in an annoyed fashion. "What're you looking at." She barked to the soon-to-be knight.

A waitress set two new pints down on the table between the knight and the princess. "Just thinking." Tiabeanie's brow cocked and took a slow, deep drink, waiting for a proper answer. "I mean, what's a Princess doing here of all places? Aren't you excited for your party?"

Her eyes rolled. "It's like you don't know me at all." She said, though her words were beginning to slur.

"Of course I don't," Pendergast bickered back, becoming slightly fed up with the Princess's snarky attitude.However, at his snapping bitterness, the princess couldn't help but smirk, and a hiccup escaped her lips. She'd only watch quietly, swirling her half-filled tankard while watching the man in a drunken intrigue. Pendergast sighed in disgruntled frustration, and despite being on the job and expecting better of himself, he wasn't ready to be shown up by some royal brat. His hand grabbed the spare tankard and took a deep drink, feeling it's sharp burn on the way down, and nearly choking on the vile taste. "So what, you don't want to go to your fancy birthday?" He said, trying to keep his stomach settled and his mouth from gagging on the wretched taste.

Bean stared into her half-filled cup, sighing in annoyance. "No, Because this party isn't even _about_ me... It's about the Kingdom's future, and introducing me to 'suitors'," She made a gagging sound at the thought. "He doesn't even care what _I_ want."

"I thought every Princess wanted to get married?" Pendergast asked, rather confused by the Princess's nature.

Bean crossed her arms in defiance. "Not me... Well, not without a reason. I don't want to marry someone just because my _dad_ tells me to. I'd rather do it on... I dunno, accident, or because I ran away and wanted to change my name." She rested her elbow on the table and her face in her hand, her other swirling the heavy tankard. "This party's going to be so stupid and boring and-" Suddenly, her eyes lifted from her drink and focused on the stranger. "Why do you care anyway?"

Pendergast wasn't too sure himself. He'd only shrug again while silently choking and gagging on his grog. As the Princess deeply drank from her large cup, it slid down her throat as easily as water, eyeing him suspiciously. "Am I not suppose to?" Pendergast offered, though cleared his throat from the burning liquid.

Bean scoffed, looking off into the crowd of dirty bodies, ignoring her unless it was time for another round. "No one else does. They all look at me like I'm suppose to be this fabulous princess who's just going to sail off and get married, but that isn't _me_."

The longer the princess complained, Pendergast couldn't help but see some charm in her, though blamed it mostly on the foul drink. He took a slow sip, only listening as the princess rambled her troubles, one person's dream seemed to be another's nightmare. "I wanna see the world, or maybe fight a bear, I haven't even _been_ to mermaid island, but I can't do that if all I'll ever be is someone for my _dad_ to marry off. I haven't even _kissed_ a guy and he expects me to find a husband and make, I don't know, little weird Dereks'? What's the point of anything if I can't choose my own destiny?" She blew stray hairs away from her reddened face before glimpsing back to Pendergast, and cocked a brow. "You're still here?" He nodded, taking another sip of the burning liquid. "Wow, most of the knights get bored by this point-"

"Fifteen minutes until last call! Get your drinks while you can!"

As the princess rose, Pendergast watched her head towards the counter; she was less than what he expected, but the more she spoke, he saw something more, something wild and alive, not like many of the women in dreamland. He stared down into his half-filled drink, not daring to try another sip, while his mind replayed the Princess's worries, curious of how someone born to royalty would want to be something of a commoner. Suddenly, her large boot kicked the table.

"You coming or what?" She asked, still holding another full tankard.

Pendergast's brows rose again, though he stood up from the table. "We're leaving?"

"Well, I got one for the road," she insisted, lifting her drink in a proud manner, as if bragging that she didn't forget. "Unless, you don't want that promotion." Pendergast's eyes widened, having forgotten about the reason he was sent to the bar in the first place. Despite only taking half a drink, he felt the tiniest bit unstable, but not enough to cause suspicion. Bean gave him a wide grin, while wordlessly turning towards the door, and hitting her shoulder against the frame on her way out. "Son of a bitch!" She shouted, staggering down the short steps into a tumble and collapsing to the ground. She held her tankard with a perfect grace, not a drop spilt. "But I got my drink!"

Pendergast stood in the doorway, staring down at Tiabeanie. Suddenly, a wide, toothy smile cracked against her lips and a loud, bellow of laughter escaped her lips, resting her head against the dirt road. Pendergast watched in bafflement, but the harder the princess laughed, the harder it was for the knight to fight joining in. He stepped down the few stairs, a wide grin spreading against his lips.

Tiabeanie lifted her empty hand. "Help me up, Pencil Goose." She said, still chuckling.

Without correcting her, Pendergast felt her rough callouses as he pulled the princess to her feet, but the moment she let go, her body swayed and her feet stumbled beneath her, though she kept her drink level.

"Princess, do you need a hand?" He offered.

"I'm fine," she insisted, but fell to the ground once more.

Pendergast's eyes rolled, but he couldn't help but smirk. "You'll pass out in the street and get picked up by the corpse-shoveler before you even get up the hill." He insisted, offering her his hand once more.

Her eyes glared at it for a minute, but in defeat, she accepted it once more. "Fine, but if you grab my waist, I'll punch you."

"I wouldn't dream of it." His tone was snarky as his arm snaked around the back of her shoulders and holding her straight. The two began to walk up the hill towards the towering castle, her large boots walking without pattern, staggering to the left, and then right into Pendergast's body. As the Princess's shoulders began to relax, and Pendergast couldn't help but feel some temptation to lower his arm to her waist. He swallowed nervously, reminding himself that she was a Princess and he would be nothing in her eyes.

"Why do you wanna be a knight anyway?" She asked loudly, interrupting Pendergast's nervous thoughts. "My dad's just gonna send you on a bunch of dangerous quests and crusades and stuff." She lifted her drink to her lips. "And it's not like he'll pay you good."

Pendergast shrugged slightly. "I guess the same reason _you_ don't want to be a Princess." Bean gave a look of skepticism over her shoulder, unsure of what the man meant. "If I could be anything I wanted, it's this."

Bean snorted, spitting half her drink out. "Walking drunks home up a giant hill."

His arm tightened slightly around Bean's shoulder instinctively. "Protecting the realm, and the king and queen..." He carefully peaked down to her blue eyes, which hazily stared ahead, trying to guess where to step next. "And you."

Bean glimpsed up, her eyes taking a misty look while staring up at the night. It felt strange for royal eyes to take such a meek look to him, especially without any sort of title. Her eyes seemed intrigued, adoring, just long enough for butterflies to hatch from the cocoons in his stomach. The moment didn't last long, however, when her head turned away, and glared to the passing by buildings. "I can take care of myself."

"I don't doubt that." He said, and surprisingly meant it.

The walk home took nearly thirty minutes, especially with Bean's slow, staggering pace up the high hill, but the conversation never slowed. Laughter filled this streets from the two arguing, bullying one another. As they walked through the front gates and past the guards, Bean offered him a sip of her grog, but when he denied, she couldn't help but pick at him. "What? You can protect the realm but not handle your booze?" The challenge made Pendergast's eyes narrow while snatching the drink and finished it off, trying his best to keep himself from gagging out the burning liquid. With the cup empty, he offered it back to the princess, cocking a brow to silently gloat his success; she snatched it from his hand, tossed it behind them, hitting one of the helms, and laughed loudly about it.

As the two tried to tiptoe past the throne room and towards Bean's quarters, the King suddenly snorted awake. The two froze suddenly, while the King's eyes hazily focused on the pair. "Well, would'ja look at that." Zøg grumbled, wearing his pyjama's and his septer fell from his fingers. "Y'got her home without a barrel." The king couldn't help but chuckle.

Pendergast's eyes furrowed. _Is that... Common?_ He thought to himself.

Tiabeanie suddenly took a far step away from Pendergast, staggering as she did so, while glaring up at her father. "Why do you _always_ have to send your _idiot_ guards after me anyway?" She said angrily.

"Because you don't know how to stay in the damn castle!" With his elbow on the thrones armrest, Zøg placed his palm to his forehead, shaking his head in frustration. "How did I get such a drunkard as a daughter-"

"How did _I_ end up with such a pig faced father!"

" _What!_ " He shrieked, before silently grumbling about the horrors of having to raise such a rebellious daughter. In his attempt to calm down, his attention focused to the young man, who's posture straightened before the king. "Well, looks like you got the job, _Sir_ Pendergast; now do your job and take the Bean to her room." Zøg took a long, careful look at Pendergast, as if trying to guess his intentions, before side-eyeing his daughter. "And you." He said, finally giving her attention. "If I hear you left, I'll cut off all of your toes off so you won't leave again!" After scolding his daughter, Zøg snuggled down into his thrown once more, his head tilting back and swiftly drifted back to sleep, mouth opened and snoring.

Pendergast looked baffled, stepping towards the king and snapping his fingers, trying to regain his attention. "Is he... really asleep?" He asked, both skeptical and amazed.

Bean chuckled, grabbing the knights' arm, leading him out of the throne room and towards the staircase. "You _really_ don't know Zøg, do you?"

"I'm not even too sure what I got myself into." He admitted, glimpsing back at the snoring king.

"Well, I can tell you it isn't good."

The two walked up the spiralling stairs case, illuminated by torches; Bean's hand slowly glided down his forearm and dared to touch his hand. His heart skipped a beat, feeling her fingers slip between his and carefully twine, clinging to his hand almost affectionately. He wasn't sure what to expect, following a princess to her room with her leading by a soft touch, but an exciting bloom filled his stomach, growing larger the higher they climbed.

When the two reached the door at the very top, a single, wooden door greeted them. Tiabeanie's hand didn't let go, but the other awkwardly brushed through her hair, getting caught in a tangle and she tugged her hand out. "Well... Thanks, for making my birthday feel a little less stupid." The meek look was strange, her eyes were softer and her voice was warmer. A bashful smile spread against her lips, her cheeks touching a warm red.

Pendergast felt as though he was looking at a different woman, not a princess, and not the commoner drunk he thought she was. "No problem." He insisted, his cheeks tinting red and not only from the grog. "It was... good to meet you." His eyes couldn't pull back if they tried, feeling as though he was melting away in the warm blue.

She took a slow step forward, and dared to give the Knight a small kiss, her very first, and silently, his as well. Her gentle purse fit perfectly against his, his nerves focusing on the gentle curve of her lips and trying to match it. His hand slowly rose, daring to cup her cheek and keeping the Princess close and let the magical, drunken haze fall over them. Despite the tangles, her hair was soft against his calloused hand, which carefully move to caress it. Despite her dirty skin, it smelled like sweet blossoms. Despite her attitude, her boisture, her obnoxiousness, Pendergast could feel his heart beating twice as fast within his chest as he kissed Princess Tiabeanie.

As Bean pulled back slowly, her forehead remained against his for a moment, filled with silent breathing that stung of liquor, though Pendergast didn't find it unpleasant. When the Princess finally opened her eyes, the red tinted finally gone from her blue-eyed gaze as she began to finally sober, staring into his once more, a smile spread wide against her lips. "G'night, _Pendergast_ ," she said softly, but enunciated his name to show she truly knew it.

"Goodnight, Princess." He murmured back, though his breath was caught in his throat and a wide grin spread against his lips, letting the Princess's hand slip from his. Bean offered him a wide, beaming smile as she stepped back, though bumped into her bedroom door. Her hand fumbled over the wood, trying to find the knob while sharing a sheepish look with the knight. After stumbling backwards and inside, she dared to keep peaking as she slowly shut the door, but a wide smile remained on her lips.

_A sir_ , he thought to himself with a sheepish smile spreading against his lips as the Princess's bedroom door slid shut. It was a big step up from just being in the knight's service, and a title that gave him permission to marry a princess, if he could find a way into her heart.

But come morning, the romantic air was gone and the angered Princess had returned. She sat with her father at the head of the room, and scoffed at each suitor she was introduced to, Pendergast couldn't help but put her disgruntled nature in his favour, assuming he had a chance. The promotion turned out a failure, with Zøg's announcement at the end of the party; after announcing Pendergasts's new lead of the guard, King Zøg insisted that he, the bravest and most trustworthy of the knights, would lead them to a far off land, and how Dreamland will own this 'mysterious fruit'. He had never led an army, and wasn't sure how to lead a crusade, but the blooming infatuation he'd felt the night before never left. It had had only grown.

While the teenager led the guards to the distant lands on their crusade, and losing his eyesight from the juice of the sour fruit, Pendergast's heart on a quest of it's own, to belong to Tiabeanie's, and to find a way to be a knight worthy of her affection.


End file.
